DAUGHTERS - A WAY TO PARADISE

Even now daughters are considered an unwanted burden in some societies and instead of rejoicing, an atmosphere of grief and disappointment is produced in the family at their birth.

This is the position, today, but in the pre-Islamic times the daughters were positively considered a shame and disgrace among the Arabs, so much so that even the right to live was denied to them. Many a hard-hearted parent used to strangle his daughter to death, with his own hands, when she was born, or bury her alive.

Abdullah ibn Abbas (may Allah be pleased with him) reports that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said

"Whoever becomes the father of a girl, he should neither hurt her nor treat her with contempt nor show preference over her to his sons in kindness and affection. (Both boys and girls should be treated alike.) Allah will grant him Paradise in return for kind treatment towards the daughter."

It is narrated that a very poor woman, with two daughters, came to Ayesha's (may Allah be pleased with her) place to beg. By chance, Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) had only one date with her, at that time, which she gave to the woman. The woman broke the date into two parts and gave one part each to the girls. She did not eat anything of it herself. When after some time, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) came, Aisha (may Allah be pleased with her) related the incident to him, upon which he remarked:

"The believing man or woman upon whom there is the responsibility of daughters and he or she discharges it well and treats them with affection, the daughters will become a means of freedom, for him or her, in the hereafter."

It is related by Anas (may Allah be pleased with her) that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said

"The believer who bears the responsibility of two daughters and supports them till they attain puberty, he and I will be close to one another like this on the Day of Judgment."

Anas (may Allah be pleased with him), adds that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) showed, by joining the fingers of his hand, that as the fingers were close to one another, in the same way will the believer be close to him on the Day of Judgment.

Abu Saeed Khudri (may Allah be pleased with him) relates that the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said 

"Whoever bears the responsibility of three daughters or sisters or even of two daughters or sisters, and bears it well, and looks after their training and welfare properly, and then, gets them married, Allah will reward him with Paradise."

In these Ahadith, the Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) has not only stated that kind treatment was the natural right or claim of the daughters, but, also that the believers who fulfilled the obligation towards them in a good and proper manner would be rewarded with Paradise in the hereafter. He, further, gives the joyful tidings that such a man will be close to him, on the Day of Judgment, as the fingers of a hand are, when joined together.

Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said,

“Anyone who has three daughters and provides for them, clothes them and shows mercy to them will definitely enter the Paradise.” A man from the people asked, “What about two daughters, O Messengerof Allah?” He replied, “And two.”   (Bukhari: al-Adab al-Mufrad)

Daughters-a Way to Paradise

There is a very special bond between a father and a daughter and the most beautiful example of this is the relationship Prophet Muhammad sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam had with daughter Fatima Radiallahu anha.

Prophet Muhammad sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam said: “Fatima is part of me. Whatever pleases her, pleases me and whatever angers her, angers me.”It is narrated in the books of sirah that Fatima bint Muhammad stood by her father when the Quraish placed animal intestines on the prophet’s back sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam while he was praying. She was always ready to support and defend her father. 

This support of her father at such an early age lent her the title mother of her father. 

Growing up in a society in which people are constantly mocking each other, I recall this little girl who would always defend her father as well. She was a child yet would not stand for anyone saying anything bad against her father jokingly or seriously. 

Her standing by him always impressed the adults and they never knew what to make of her. This little girl, unbeknownst to her, was following the steps of Fatima Radiallahu anha. Fatima Radiallahu anha would care for the household and her father until she got married and even after her marriage she would often think of bringing food to her father. The prophet sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam would also do the same. One time, Fatima Radiallahu anha brought some barley bread to her beloved father and his response was “This is the first food your father has eaten for three days.”

Jabir ibn ‘Abdullah reported that the Messenger of Allah, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said,“Anyone who has three daughters and provides for them, clothes them and shows mercy to them will definitely enter the Garden.” A man from the people said, “And two daughters, Messenger of Allah?” He said, “And two.” Thus, we see how beneficial a father could be to a daughter and vice versa.

When the Sahabas could not find the messenger sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam, they would often go to his daughter’s house because he was very often there. When Fatima got married, she moved next to her father sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam. As a child, Fatima would often accompany her father almost everywhere and was right by his side when the Quraish were abusing him. They spent much time together and he sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam knew her interests, her likes and dislikes and she knew his. Daughters should be loving and respectful towards their father. When a child is obedient and loving towards the parents, the parents automatically soften up towards the child and a stronger bond develops. 

Daughters should share their various interests with their father just like they would with their mothers. They should serve respectfully and lovingly their father as per the Sunna.Daughters could take example on Fatima Radiallahu anha and on the fact that she would serve and cater to her father’s needs so much so that she was called the mother of her father. Fathers should put their daughter’s happiness ahead of personal gain or social gain. 

The messenger sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam did not hesitate to let others know that his daughter’s happiness was his happiness and her sorrow and anger his sorrow and anger. He was so concerned about her happiness that when Fatimah got married, he sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam personally went to visit her the day after her wedding to check on her and give again his blessings to the newly-weds. Indeed in the Messenger of Allah you have a good example to follow for him who hopes in (the Meeting with) Allah and the Last Day…(Surah Al-Ahzab 33:21)